Seth, Tyler and I went out yesterday and they saw me doing my hair so they wanted me to do their hair too, that is what the pictures are, lol they are so cute.
Yesterday Rob and I went to the hospital to get his blood tested to see if he could have chemo today and they said that his white blood cell count was too low it was .04, and .00 is the lowest. White blood cells help to fight infection, with it that low the chemo will just wipe out the rest of them. They have this really good drug that will bring his white blood count up and it is super expensive, we have coverage of 80% and that still left us with $185.00 to pay every 2 weeks because he will be on this drug for the rest of the time. I was so upset I started crying I think it was because of sudden bomb being dropped on us, last week we went for the same test and the doctors didn't think that Rob would need to be on the drug. The nurse then told us of this program that if we qualify they will pay the 20% that our plan does not cover. We then went to the hospital pharmacy with our form and the pharmacist said that we should just call them right away and that we could just do it over the phone..... 45 minutes later the company says that we have to pay $100.00 every time and that they will pay the rest, again we can not afford that every 2 weeks for the next 6 months. I mean we would have found a way but because he needed it but we don't have credit cards so it would have made it difficult. Rob needed the drug immediately because his white blood count was so low. Another 30 minutes later we called them back and they assessed again and said that they would cover the whole amount for us, WOW!! we were so happy, and I was so impressed that the pharmacist stayed late to help us figure this out. They went over and above their job to help us they could have told us to go home and call the drug company and come back tomorrow, I think they recognized that his white blood count was low and that was an issue.
You would think it is all good and done now right? Wrong!! The drug is to administered like a flu shot or insulin shot, and you have to do it at home by yourself. I was freaking out thinking that I would have to give the needle to Rob. Then on the way home I remembered that Leslie (step mom) was a nurse and that she probably gave lots of needles so we called her and she said that yes she could do it.
Rob has to have it for 3 days in a row every 2 weeks. Rob called me this morning and asked how many Tylenol he could take, one of the side effects of the drug is your bones are sore, he is in a lot of pain, and will be every time he has to take it which is tonight, tomorrow night and then all over again in 2 weeks.
It feels like we are walking in the dark about everything that we are going through it feels like I don't know the first thing about anything. They tell us to watch for a headache so Rob gets one and then we call and they say oh he is ok check his temperature and if it is fine then he can have tylenol and the only thing he can take is tylenol he can't have and aspirin or an advil cause they have blood thinners in them. At this time we can't look into the future for even a week, we have been asked what are you doing for Christmas and we have no idea it is too far away, will we even have a house then?electricity? heat?, my doctor is not returning the insurance forms so that we can submit them to our mortgage company. Which reminds me I should call the mortgage company and see if there is anything else we can do about it...... good news there is I can take the forms to the doctor who is treating him for the cancer and he will fill it out for sure.
Ok now I am all worked up so I have to go now

Well things seem to be ok with Rob, he is really tired though. He went to work today and I spoke with him and he seemed ok.
I am currently unemployed, I quit my job on Friday, I wont post why cause that could lead to problems, I am looking for another job though and have handed out resumes. I think I should switch careers, I want to be a wedding planner but the most difficult thing is to get reputation. I have done 2 weddings, some birthday parties and 2 bridal shower parties I love it. I applied for an internship to be a wedding planner but they only choose 1 per year and they don't start looking until November, here's to hoping.
I wanted to share this video we took last night, we were all playing with the bowling ball set and Rob decided to use Tyler as a bowling ball it was so funny.

I think I should change this blog to "About Rob", lol!! Rob and I went to his first chemo treatment today and 2 hours after he says he feels fine just tired. The people in the cancer ward were really nice and hopeful and had lots of good tips and information for us. I really want to be there for Rob he should not have to go to treatment by himself, I just started a new job and I have to prove that I am loyal there as well, if I had been there for years I think it would be different story. I feel so torn about taking the day off to be with Rob, when I should be at work.
I don't really have anything else to say we haven't really done anything, the boys are doing really well, growing to fast for me though, especially since I am not around all the time now, they seem to grow faster. They are so cute, last Saturday Rob took Seth to the track with him and they played with remote controls, Seths doesn't work but he had to do everything Rob did, if Rob was fixing his Seth had to have a screw driver to fix his too, Rob put his in the trunk on the way home so Seth did too. I took Tyler Saturday and we went to Walmart. I bought Tyler a new blanky and I let him pick it out I gave him 2 choices and he looked back and forth a couple times tested them both, lol I am not kidding and then choose the fuzzy one, so to make sure that is the one he wanted I tried to give him a different one and he says "no waanit" lol he is so cute! and then to top it off when we got home he didn't want the new one we bought he wanted the old one. Grrrr!! and I can't find anymore like that one but if I do I will buy them all. Well that is all for now I haven't had a nap in a long time so I am going to have a nap today.

We have more news today. Rob starts Chemotherapy on Wednesday the 16th, I will be taking the day off to be with him.
I don' even know what to say somehow it seems I am supposed to talk so that I am not holding anything in, I am so confused I don't even know where to start. If I think about what Rob has to go through, as in not working when he loves to work and he will not be able to do anything at home because he will fell awful, my problems and concerns seem so small. I have to be so strong, I will have to do all the cleaning, have a full time job, cook and be a mom. Rob has done so much for the last year when I was working part time and full time. It is going to such an adjustment for both of us, Rob helps me with the cooking and cleaning, and now he wont be able to. I know I am not the only one to go through this but this is how I feel.
I know not to panic yet. Someone told me a story that his brother was feeling tired but ate really healthy and exercised everyday, and then his daughter had a health issue but felt fine, they both did tests and the daughter was not low on any vitamins or stuff like that and the guys brother was low on about 3 things. The story was told to me to say that things are not always as they seem. I think we make things bigger than they are, but for the record I am terrified, I told like seeing people in pain, and especially people I love.
I know we will make it through I love you Rob!!

So my dad just got married yesterday. The ceremony was really nice and so was the reception. I started at 10:30 in the morning to start decorating, then got ready cause I was in the wedding. Then went and got our pictures taken and then came back for the reception, stayed and danced and then cleaned up. For all of you who have been married you know how much work it is to coordinate a wedding and make sure it runs smoothly. The Bride didn't lift a finger that day. I am not complaining, I love doing that stuff. I don't have pics of the hall but I made the center pieces and the favors, with Robs help. Here are some pics of from Rob's moms camera. The one of the people taking pics of us, Rob was saying there is paparazzi following us, so he was taking a picture of the papparazzi following us, lol they were family and the photographers